Survey


I have quite a few questions in each section. I am leaving much of the survey open ended so please feel free to write as much as you want. All information that you share will be kept confidential and used only in generalized statements. Most will also be re-phrased. I will publish the results of the survey on the Whirly Wives blog http://whirlywives.blogspot.com. I am seeking wisdoms and opinions so if I missed an important question please add your comments at the end of appropriate section, I would love to hear it. Please be honest and have fun.
General Information
Your Age? _______________________________________________________________
Education level? __________________________________________________________
What is your occupation?  __________________________________________________
Do you work outside of the home? ____YES ____NO
How long have you been in a relationship with your pilot? ____________________
Are you married?  ______ YES ______NO
How long has your partner been a commercially rated pilot? ________________ YRS.
Does your pilot travel for work? ______ YES _____NO
How much time away does your partner spend in a month? _________ Days
How much time away does your partner spend on average in a year? _________Months
How many times have you relocated for your husband’s career? ___________

Let’s talk about personality and your pilot.
What personality type would you say your pilot is (check one)?
_____ Type A individuals can be described as impatient, time-conscious, controlling, concerned about their status, highly competitive, ambitious, business-like, aggressive, having difficulty relaxing known as “stress junkies” (Wikipedia.com)
_____ Type B individuals, in contrast, are described as patient, relaxed, and easy-going, generally lacking an overriding sense of urgency  (Wikipedia.com)
_____ Type AB mix of both not clearly defined.
Is your pilot an introvert or extrovert? _______________________________________
What is your personality type? (use A, B or AB)_________________________________
Do you feel you complement each other well?__________________________________
What are your pilot’s greatest strengths?______________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What are your pilot’s weaknesses?___________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
What do you think is easy or positive for your pilot about this lifestyle?______________
________________________________________________________________________
What are some his greatest challenges? (If you don’t know ask him it’s in the name of science) _________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Is there an adjustment period after your pilot returns home? _____YES _____NO If yes for how long? ____________________________________________________________
How do you deal with the 1st day back jitters?___________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Do you find that last day home is hectic? Why or why not? ________________________
________________________________________________________________________
How do you cope with the day before and last day atmosphere in your home?________
________________________________________________________________________
Children
Do you have any children? _______YES  ________NO  If no skip to Relationship Section.
How many children do you have? ____________________________________________
What are the ages of your children? __________________________________________
Do your children attend daycare?______ YES _________ NO
Do you see behavioral patterns in your children depending on your partner’s travel? For example increased whining, disobedience, testing boundaries, acting out, withdraw, difficulty sleeping, nightmares, others?________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
How do you handle issues that arise, be specific in techniques or patterns that you have developed that work for your family?_________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Do you see a difference in rules between the times that you are a “single” parent and when your spouse return or are you consistent please elaborate?___________________
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
How would you define your pilot’s relationship with your children, involved hands on, authority figure other?_____________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Do you experience gaps in rules and understanding of what is going on upon your spouse’s return home? Explain.______________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Do you have difficulty sharing the parenting hat? Explain._________________________
________________________________________________________________________
How do you present a united font? ___________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
How do you think the transition from a team parenting to single parenting affects you as a parent?________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
It is no secret that your pilot will miss some firsts how do you compensate? Do you hold off on some activities so that he can experience them as well?_____________________
________________________________________________________________________
 How do you compensate when daddy is away on special occasions birthdays, holidays ect?____________________________________________________________________
 Relationship
What is the biggest challenge in the relationship? _______________________________
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Do you feel that it is a personality issue or is it a result of the occupation?____________
________________________________________________________________________
Do you experience lowered or increase libido depending on your husband’s schedule?
________________________________________________________________________
How do you create romance when he is gone? (you may provide some insight if you want to share)?___________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Do you find yourself giving in when you know he is going away soon to avoid an argument? Elaborate ______________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Do you alone or both of you put forth an effort to make the transitions between him being at home and leaving for work smooth? ___________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Do you experience disappointment when he is not able to talk to you when away? How do you cope?_____________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Is his time at home spent with the family, are there issues of falling into routine and being a part? _____________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________

Communication
How important do you think communication is in the relationship? Extremely 5 4 3 2 1 Not very
What type of a communicator is your pilot?[1] Choose one from below________________
Linear versus Circular = straight line discussion versus a more circular approach
Direct versus Indirect = meaning conveyed by words versus through suggestion 
Detached versus Attached = objective presentation versus expressive style
Intellectual Engagement versus Relational Engagement = Discussion is about the task versus discussion about the task and the person
Concrete versus Abstract = example driven versus theory driven discussion
Please explain why you feel that he is a particular type of a communicator. ___________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Communication is composed of "55% body language, 38% tone of voice, 7% content of words"[2] Do you feel that your communication suffers because a lot of it is over phone or computer?_______________________________________________________________
How do you compensate for missing parts of communication?_____________________
________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Do you feel that life is easier since we have cell phones with texting and the internet with skype? What are some benefits and drawbacks of the current technology that is available to us?___________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
About you
Do you experience difficulty sleeping when your spouse is gone? Explain ____________
________________________________________________________________________
If yes how do you overcome the difficulty? What are some skills that you have that help you rest?________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
How does your stress level change when your pilot is away versus when he is home?___
________________________________________________________________________
Do you feel secure in your home? _____ YES ______NO Why? _____________________
What do you do to gain that sense of security?__________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Are you afraid or worried when your husband is flying? If no skip next question._______
Is it often or occasionally ___________________________________________________
What do you do to cope with the fear?________________________________________
Do you feel like the entire household responsibility rests on your shoulders?_________
________________________________________________________________________
How do you handle issues like house and car maintenance or problems when your pilot is away?_________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Do you feel resentful? Why or why not?_______________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
How do you take care of you when you are alone?_______________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Do you plan things for your family when your pilot is away?_______________________
________________________________________________________________________
Do you hesitate to make plans or commitments – why?___________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Are your friends understanding of your schedule?_______________________________
________________________________________________________________________
How does your interaction change with your friends between trips?_________________
________________________________________________________________________
Are your friends supportive or do you find they lack in understanding?_______________
________________________________________________________________________
What are the benefits of being married to a pilot?_______________________________
________________________________________________________________________
Any other words of wisdom that you want to share with other wives.________________
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Thank you for taking the time to take the survey.
Aggie the Whirly Wife



[1] http://www2.pacific.edu/sis/culture/pub/1.5.3_-_Communication_styles.htm
[2]  Wikipedia.com

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